“I spent my whole childhood wishing I were older and now I’m spending my adulthood wishing I were younger.” – Ricky Schroder
NOTE : This blog isn’t about Mike Shinoda’s “Where’d you go”. I love the song though. You must listen to it if you haven’t already. 😀
A day off from work.
“Why isn’t there any space?”
She talks out loud to herself as she makes room for her office files.
Another drawer. But instead of her old diaries and files, there’s drawing books, photo albums, cassettes, some CDs of her childhood memories and a kitchen set; with all those cute little kitchen items. Cups, a kettle, plates and everything with not even one scratch on them. There’s a smile on her face. She goes through them all like a kid in a candy store. And the tension? It’s gone.
As she picks up a CD to play, she sees a file named “Space Facts”. She puts the CD down and while going through the file recalls, how she wanted to become an astronaut and looked up to Kalpana Chawla since the fifth grade and laughs at what she has become. A fashion designer. She doesn’t regret her decision. She chose this profession. It’s the work load that keeps her busy and stresses her. She loves her job. She’s just amazed by the fact, how ambitious she was as a child.
“Love what you do and do what you love”. A quote by Ray Bradbury, is what she believes in.
She continues watching the CDs, playing cassettes of her favourite songs that she used to collect. People now, hardly listened to the cassettes. They’ve songs downloaded in the mobile phones these days.
After going through them all, she just sits still on the floor with her legs stretched and the drawer opened with everything lying outside on the floor. She holds the remote in her hand and as she stares into oblivion, she recalls some memories. Sometimes, she just wants to be the little child she was, again.
She misses the freedom. She was dependent on her parents, yet she was free. She could watch the television however, whenever she wanted. She remembers how she would fall asleep on the couch while watching television and end up on the bed the next morning. She remembers the story sessions with her mother, where after listening to a story, she would narrate the same story to her mother and change the character’s name. She remembers celebrating birthday in school; when she would distribute one candy each to the entire class and two candies to her best friend and the class teacher.
And now? She is independent. Great. But with the independence, comes responsibilities. She rents a house now. She has taxes to pay. She has bills to pay. Phone bill, electricity bill, internet bill, and what not. On top of it, she’s about to get married. She waits all week for friday, thinking she would get to relax a little. She gets herself an appointment for a spa. She has a few friends. She does not party much. So, what she does is, she gets herself some movies in a pendrive from her colleagues, to watch on friday nights. It’s fine. It’s fun. Still, she misses being at home. She lives by herself. Right? No matter how much she tries, she’s never off work. She has to cook even after work. She has laundary to do, that’s been piled up for the two days she has.
She’s lost in her thoughts. Suddenly, it strikes her why she decided to open the drawers.
Meanwhile, her phone rings.
Before she picks up the phone. With a poker face, she puts everything back in the drawer and gets back to work.