It’s been a while now. She still curses him for what happened. She loathes him. The chain of sleepless nights, continues. There’s love. But at the same time, a feeling of hatred and anger dwells.
The conversation ended. Their story didn’t. How could it? She loved him. She still does. She would take him back in a minute. She wanted to, but she couldn’t. And that’s what kept her from moving on. She started looking everywhere for distraction. And she turned to food. It could’ve been anything. Cigarettes. Alcohol. A kiss or a one night stand with a former lover. A friend. A stranger, maybe. But eating became the one thing she could look forward to. And a pillow to cry on.
She kept feeling used. She kept thinking how she was an option for someone who meant the world to her. She couldn’t stop picturing them both do the things he used to do to her. Making her laugh. Loving her. Holding her. Saying things he wanted to do with/to/for her. Having long, late night conversations with her. Everything.
She missed him.
She deleted his number and blocked him from everywhere possible. There is no way he could reach her. And then one day, she unblocked him. No reason, she just did. She wanted him to talk to her first. As she saw her inbox, there it was. His name. She opened his messages and read it all. She then realised that there wasn’t a day he didn’t text her (apologise to her) since that day. With the tears rolling down her face, she just wanted to hug him in that very moment. With every text, she said “I love you”(just not out loud).
She continued showing her anger through texts and phone calls. He continued explaining everything to her. As stubborn as they both were, none of them gave up. Despite of what he had to listen, he did not let his pride come in the way. He knew he did wrong. He accepted every word she said and wasn’t proud of it. He was sorry. He cried. They both did. And this was new to her. No one ever cried for her this much before. Not even a little. She could sense that everything he said in that one year might be a lie, but the tears weren’t fake. She couldn’t react to it.
One thing was clear now. He loved her. Just as much as she did. He just wanted a chance to explain everything to her. She listened to him this time. He told her how guilty he was to have things messed up with her. That he wanted to tell her everything sooner. That he was afraid to lose her. That he had to choose between the other girl and her and that he chose her.
He messed up relations just to be with her. He chose his one year old love over the seven years old friendship.
He told her that he only loved her and no one else. He wanted to end up with her. Be there for her. He wanted to do anything and everything he can to make things right again. He wanted to prove it to her that she was never an option and that he never used her. If he had to, he wouldn’t want her back so bad when he had a choice to go back to his friend. He told her everything that seemed hard to believe after what did. She was hurt and obviously, dealt with some trust issues. She wanted to believe him but she couldn’t. After much crying and talking and arguing and fighting for a month;
“Take as much time as you want. Just come back.”
“I took my time. I think I can give this a chance.”
“I love you.”
” 🙂 ”
He couldn’t argue with that.
THINGS WERE GOOD AGAIN.
It’s been two months since the make up. Things seemed just as before. Good. Beautiful. She forgave him. He kept his promise. He proved what he said he would. They considered whatever that happened, a bad phase of their lives and forgot about it. Although, some things about the past still bothered her. To which he promised to work on and make her forget about it.
This was just the way she wanted it to be since the beginning. Now, soulmates weren’t a myth anymore.